Tuesday, February 4, 2014

Corn Dog

"It's easier to go get one," he said! 
"Well ya', it's easier, but how does it taste?"
That's what I said to my friend when I asked him if we should make them from scratch! 
I had this weekend imaged in my head, a weekend devoted to the corn dog.
A day spend on a farm learning about corn, how it grows, the uses of corn and the different types of corn that grow in the US. I thought about all the different corn batter recipes and meeting with a top Portland chef to Learn the secret of  corn dog batter. Then there is the meat. What is it? Do I just go get a hot dog? Or is it a special hot dog? Should it be Kosher? The list ran from my little tiny spot on earth to the dark side of the Moon and back in less than one second. 
Yes, how would it taste? It would taste different, not better, not worse, just different. 
It would taste of white kitchens with granite and stainless steel appliances. Hours spent planning  the perfect day and cultural outing. Organic meats would be ground up by a young thin man covered in tattoos, his lip sporting a 70's porno mustache or by a woman with a PHD in psychology who is a self taught butcher. This would take place on some farm where all the animals have names and a birthdate. A restaurant would open to serve this very special corn dog. They would serve chili in a ice cream cone, tater tots, high end Mac and Cheese, expensive top shelf whisky and this designer corn dog.
I had already started the research in my brain when a flash of white light crossed inside my forehead. A coffee headache? A small stroke? Or divine inspiration? 
"Hey", I said, nudging his left shoulder, "The 711 is this way, right?" 
He smiled and nudged me back. "Do you think they have french's mustard packs?", I ask.
"No," he said, "They have a French's mustard pump, ketchup, and mayo. We got two corn dogs, Pepsi, and I worked that mustard pump.